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Movie Review: Kill Her Goats

Review by Paul J. Baio

Kill Her Goats claims to be a return to classic slasher films of the ’80s. It’s actually the first horror movie that ever put me to sleep. Yes, not even Skinamarink put me to sleep. The first 30 minutes of this movie is girls talking about taking showers. The second 30 minutes of this movie is girls taking showers… while covering their boobs. The 10 minutes that follow is a freshly showered girl dreaming about walking through a foggy graveyard. I can’t even tell you what happens in the last 25 minutes because I passed out from boredom.