{"id":18201,"date":"2026-02-03T05:55:00","date_gmt":"2026-02-03T10:55:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/?p=18201"},"modified":"2026-02-17T18:53:23","modified_gmt":"2026-02-17T23:53:23","slug":"i-keep-chasing-this-tail-but-the-tail-gets-bigger-go-figure-a-thousand-more-stories-keep-the-fires-and-flames-alive-so-how-the-fuck-do-i-dream-at-night-with-the-memories-of-a-borrowed-death-the-gu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/?p=18201","title":{"rendered":"I keep chasing this tail but the tail gets bigger go figure. A thousand more stories keep the fires and flames alive. So how the fuck do I dream at night? With the memories of a borrowed death, the guilty past."},"content":{"rendered":"
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Its INSANE how much this looks exactly like Melita although I don’t think she’d ever wear anything that tight. <\/p>\n\n\n

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This photo from Erika Teitell<\/a> (Karlton’s daughter) made me very happy this week. Thank you!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A classic mk ultraviXXXen t shirt which she found after 19 years.<\/p>\n\n\n

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January 30th the anniversary of my all time favorite MINSITRY record:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Filth Pig<\/strong><\/em> is the sixth studio album<\/a> by American industrial metal<\/a> band Ministry<\/a>, released on January 30, 1996, by Warner Bros. Records<\/a>. The title was allegedly derived from a statement made in the British Houses of Parliament<\/a>, in which the band’s leader Al Jourgensen<\/a> was described as a “filthy pig” for his onstage theatrics by MP Teddy Taylor<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despite being the band’s highest-charting album in the US, it was negatively received by reviewers, sharply divided the band’s fanbase, and did not live up to the platinum-selling success of Psalm 69<\/a>.<\/em>  Despite poor sales, the album entered several charts, peaking at the highest positions Ministry has ever achieved.<\/p>\n\n\n

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Over the last 2 weeks I’ve gone through thousand s of photos that I’ve found on CDR’s of classic MK ULTRA Magazine images from 1999-2006 and was blown away. There are still discs of events including concerts and other appearances by yours truly I have yet to open. Finding a disc of KARLTON images of Talia Juliette was a bittersweet find. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I also dived deep into old VHS vacation and road trip footage that I have either never seen or haven’t seen in decades. Driving cross country several times to KS, NE, CO, NM, AZ, ID and Mexico. Also camping trips in WI and Mammoth Caverns KY. I found footage of exploring ruins on the Virgin Islands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Seeing how happy I am at beaches and camping in various locations in nature and surrounded by wildlife seemingly unaffected by humans in our National Parks. <\/p>\n\n\n

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Made a new friend in December 2016 in Ybor City FL when I went solo to see the Electric Hellfire Club reunion, On that trip I also got to spend a day with Eric Bandauski<\/a> and his wife.<\/p>\n\n\n

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Summer 1997 at OZZZFEST with Heather Hobbs who was once a very important ingredient to MK ULTRA Magazine and my life as well. I found hours of VHS tapes of our adventures as well.<\/p>\n\n\n

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SATURDAY MORNING\/AFTERNOON DOUBLE FEATURE<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n

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Too Late<\/strong><\/em> is a 2015 American neo-noir<\/a> crime drama film<\/a> written and directed by Dennis Hauck. The film was shot in 35 mm<\/a> Techniscope<\/a> in five long takes<\/a>, each filmed with a single 20-minute uncut shot. In the film, a private investigator (John Hawkes<\/a>) scours the streets of Los Angeles to track down a missing woman from his past. He then finds himself tangled up in a sleazy scandal involving strip clubs, petty drug dealers, and missing girls.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I absolutely loved this movie, the manner in which it was presented and the amazing cast. This is one of those endings you really never see coming. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Jack Harris (Luke Wilson) is a legitimate Texas businessman who wanders off the straight-and-narrow path when he meets Wayne Beering (Giovanni Ribisi) and Buck Dolby (Gabriel Macht), a slimy pair of Internet porn profiteers. Jack’s association with the men leads to his involvement with a host of other lowlifes, and though he tries to convince himself that he is staying clean in a dirty business, his disintegrating family situation proves otherwise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


Middle Men argues pretty convincingly that Internet commerce wouldn’t be possible without porn. Two cocaine-driven would-be pornographers named Wayne (Giovanni Ribisi, Avatar) and Buck (Gabriel Macht, The Spirit) invented the credit card protocol that makes buying over the Internet possible–and then came close to capsizing from their own indulgences and some bad decisions involving Russian mobsters. That’s where Jack Harris (Luke Wilson, The Royal Tenenbaums) came in. Harris is simply a levelheaded guy who can see solutions where others only see problems–and he sees the potential to make more money than even Buck and Wayne had dreamed. What’s most surprising about Middle Men is how a movie based on a true story featuring porn stars and Russian gangsters has turned out a bit bland–particularly since it’s written and directed by George Gallo, who wrote one of the most character-rich screenplays ever, Midnight Run. Of course, as one of the movie’s producers is the man on whom Jack Harris is based, it was unlikely that Harris would be depicted as anything but a fundamentally decent guy who lost his way for a while. Despite this, Middle Men features an abundance of entertaining supporting performances and many of the true-to-life twists are startling. Above all, Rade Serbedzija (Before the Rain) gives the movie a jolt of pure menace as the Russian mob boss.<\/p>\n\n\n\n


It stars Luke Wilson, Giovanni Ribisi, Gabriel Macht, James Caan, Kevin Pollak, Laura Ramsey and Kelsey Grammer.<\/p>\n\n\n

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Dave McAnally co hosted the podcast Sunday 2\/1\/2026 with LOWSUNDAY<\/p>\n\n\n

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Getting very excite about having Michael Ciravolo back on the podcast 2\/22\/2026<\/p>\n\n\n

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Michael Ciravolo is the president of Schecter Guitar Research and the designer behind the company’s Diamond Series guitars. Schecter was formed in 1976 to provide replacement parts for guitars made by other companies. With the help of engineers and designers the company changed focus and began creating its own guitars.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In his own words: “Born of frustration and creativity, <\/strong>BEAUTY IN CHAOS<\/em> is far more than my \u2018solo\u2019 album.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is a convergence of textures and styles that I envisioned blossoming and evolving.  I certainly imposed some constraints on this debut release, mainly that I would play all guitars and no synthesizers would be used.  Not from my ego, but as a personal challenge to myself.  I wanted to see if I could create the sounds and textures I heard in my head.   I think that rather lofty goal was accomplished only in thanks to the other constant in BIC, my long time friend Michael Rozon.  A world-class engineer, mixer, producer and musician who pushed me to give my better-than-best on every note on this entity we created.  A true sound alchemist, he helped me to orchestrate compositions using only our wide array of guitars and effect pedals \u2026  lifting, but never overshadowing the songs.  Honestly?  Rozon is the engine that revved BIC –  it was him that pushed and encouraged me to explore the sounds and textures in my mind and start BIC.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

BEAUTY IN CHAOS would not have been possible without these amazingly talented artists, many who will continue in the evolution of BIC.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My eternal gratitude to Robin Zander<\/strong> (Cheap Trick<\/a>), Wayne Hussey<\/strong> (The Mission<\/a>), Tim Palme<\/strong>r (Tim Palmer<\/a>) Ashton Nyte<\/strong> (The Awakening<\/a>), Simon Gallup<\/strong> (The Cure<\/a>), Al Jourgensen<\/strong> (Ministry<\/a>), Michael Anthony (Van Halen<\/a>), Evi Vine <\/strong>(Evi Vine<\/a>), Michael Aston<\/strong> (Gene Loves Jezebel<\/a>), Johnny Indovina<\/strong> (Human Drama<\/a>), dUg Pinnick<\/strong> (Kings X<\/a>), Pete Parada<\/strong> (The Offspring<\/a>), Betsy Martin<\/strong> (Caterwaul<\/a>\/ Purr Machine<\/a>), Marc Danzeisen<\/strong> (The Riverdogs<\/a>), Kevin Kipnis<\/strong> (Kommunity FK \/ Purr Machine<\/a>), Dirk Doucette<\/strong> (Gene Loves Jezebel<\/a>), Pando<\/strong> (A Flock of Seagulls<\/a>), Rudy Matchinga<\/strong> (Red Scare<\/a>), <\/strong>Tish Ciravolo<\/strong> (Stun Gun<\/a>) and ICE-T<\/strong> (Body Count<\/a>)<\/p>\n\n\n

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“555 and I hope I made the right decision”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Its INSANE how much this looks exactly like Melita although I don’t think she’d ever wear anything that tight. This photo from Erika Teitell (Karlton’s daughter) made me very happy this week. Thank you! A classic mk ultraviXXXen t shirt which she found after 19 years. January 30th the anniversary of my all time favorite… Read More »I keep chasing this tail but the tail gets bigger go figure. A thousand more stories keep the fires and flames alive. So how the fuck do I dream at night? With the memories of a borrowed death, the guilty past.<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":18202,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","neve_meta_sidebar":"","neve_meta_container":"","neve_meta_enable_content_width":"","neve_meta_content_width":0,"neve_meta_title_alignment":"","neve_meta_author_avatar":"","neve_post_elements_order":"","neve_meta_disable_header":"","neve_meta_disable_footer":"","neve_meta_disable_title":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"_themeisle_gutenberg_block_has_review":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18201","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-diary-of-a-damned-man"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18201","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=18201"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18201\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18564,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18201\/revisions\/18564"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/18202"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=18201"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=18201"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mkultramagazine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=18201"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}